Grungy Old men

Today when I was running around Lake Calhoun, I ran by an old man who was walking in the other direction. Lake Calhoun is populated moslty with 20somethings: a bunch of musclebound meat heads who threaten my masculinty and rollerblading ex-sorority girls wearing make-up.

Before you accuse me of being a lake bigot, and tell me how it's not cool to stereotype lakes or girls that exercise in make-up, hear me out. There are easily thousands of people a day that go around Calhoun that are exceptions to this rule. And this includes myself and this old guy that I was coming across.


image from http://www.phototour.minneapolis.mn.us/

Anyway, old guys on the lake always catch my eye beause I think it's inspiring to see them still exercising and because they are one of the few men on Lake Calhoun who don't make me look like, well, candyass British royalty.

But what was notable about this guy is he was wearing a Speedo. A real snug one too, I might add. Just walking along with nothing on but his glasses, sandals, and Speedo. I'm not sure if he was who the lasses had in mind when they put their lipstick and rollerblades on this morning, but he certainly caught my attention.

So this brings me to my point in all this. For years, I have been looking forward to, and not dreading, getting old. I'm sure the rest of my 30s, 40s, and ensuing mid-life crisis will be a grand time. Parenthood will shake the foundations of my identity and have some profound maturing and nurturing effect on me.

But that's all the appetizer. I can't wait to be an old fart. If I want to wear my Speedo in public, who's to stop me? I'm an old man! If I want to shout nonsense like "ball five!" at random, who will disagree with me? People will have to respect every action I do, no matter how ludricous it is.

The downside to all this is the dying part. So I need to stay healthy to really maximize those golden years. That's why you'll see me at the YWCA tomorrow working out and then eating a salad for dinner. Between now and then, I'll be fine-tuning my old man skills. Anyone up for whiskey sours for breakfast?

BALL FIVE!!!